The Peace is Louder Than the Protection Ever Was

I built walls to keep pain out. Strong ones. Unshakable. But I didn’t realize those same walls were keeping out the joy, too. The love. The softness. The peace.

I used to live with my jaw tight and my heart guarded. Ready to flight, ready to flee, but never fully ready to feel. Even my happiness came with a warning label. Like, “don’t get too comfortable… something’s coming.”

Truth is, that armor did serve me. It got me through hell. It let me survive spaces that were never safe. It kept me strong in relationships I had already outgrown. But over time, I stopped taking it off. I didn’t wear protection, I became it.

Now, Im in the most uncomfortable season of my life. And somehow, it’s the most beautiful one too. This season, is asking me to soften. To rest. To be led, and loved without flinching.

Letting go of that armor has been sacred…tender…. at times awkward. But oh so necessary. And the truth is, I’m already becoming her. The version of me who isn’t bracing for impact anymore. Who receives without guilt, breathes without pressure and welcomes joy without questioning if she’s earned it.